Unfortunately, I'm not speaking of Janet Jackson's fierce "Black Cat" track, instead I'm talking about my favorite time of year that is coming around again....fall. The weather is starting to cool which means boots and hats can come out to play like a playful kitten once more as they pounce on the crispy, ever changing leaves that line the walkways of sidewalks and streets. October has this funny way of making black and darker colors a staple in the wardrobe. Perhaps it's the witches and ghouls of Halloween that inspires the "dark side" of fashion to grace the ads of magazines. Black to me is the color of mystery and elegance. Like the mysteries and superstitious tales of the black cat, a person can blend in or stand out in all black. Pops of colors and patterns can shine when wearing black. Want to show off a statement necklace or ring? Wear black. Nothing to wear? Black is the "go to" color that most are drawn to because it goes with practically anything yet makes one look effortlessly polished. Who doesn't want that? Black, what a puuuuurfect color....meow!
The many hats we wear in a day let alone a week or a month can be so draining. The past two months had my anxieties on high alert due to the stresses of work and trying to balance everything else in my life out. Lets just say I've been pushed out of comfort zone in different aspects. I was also bummed out last month when I had a birthday and due to work I couldn't make time to breathe and actually spend my day with friends who have been there for me through the good and bad times. I even had friends that were hurt because they felt as if I were blowing them off! I was too exhausted to move last month to even plan anything and I floated wherever the wind blew me. Honestly, escaping town on a mini vacay to the beach with my significant other sounded perfect, but it wasn't possible at the time due to our opposing schedules. Life is hard. However, it is extremely important to know that it's alright to relax and have fun every once in awhile because life is too short to not live up to what your soul craves. Problem is that no matter what you say or do in this life, because of the world we live in today, you will be judged in both good ways and bad ways. People will always find something they don't like about you or a situation and they will not always agree with everything you say or do. It is fine they do this because everyone is entitled to their own opinions and you can't control how person behaves or thinks. There can only be trust. People can work on things to get better, but how do you tell someone those things when they are already set in their ways? Are there any winning solutions to make everyone happy and satisfied without it ending up in an extreme match of trying to knock each other down in every way imaginable? I've witnessed and heard so much heart ache from the people around me it makes me sad. Empathizing with someone and what they are going through drains my sprit because I want to help them so bad, but sometimes I can only be there to listen. I feel deeply for people to where I can feel their pain and hear their souls screaming for help, yet I can't always help them and I get disappointed. In turn, it makes me depressed because I know what it feels like to be down, feel unworthy filled with insecurities. Those sensitive feelings can erupt to anger and resentment and all it does is build up like a hard wall inside. The "hard wall" is not healthy for anyone. It's our own minds that scare and haunt us. Peace comes when you can learn to shut the nonsense chatter that goes on in your head and not believe everything your mind perceives. Children are sometimes the best teachers because they haven't been exposed to this jaded world. We all used to be like that and as we grow older we lose sight on how to just be without being bogged down by our own polluted minds.