Happy Lunar New Year.
February is here and I am glad to be in it after the long month of January. I've decided that I am done blogging about the surface, materialistic style and fashion stuff. Don't get me wrong I do love fashion, but I'm also a real person with real struggles. I have to remember that I started this blog for me and not just to please everyone. This is my therapy. I write because it helps me whether people are reading or not.
You know how everyone has a personal battle of some sort that they may be going through? I'll go ahead and share what has been ailing me on every level of my being lately. They say it can always be worse right? I agree except when I feel pain every day, it's hard to think that there are other things out there than fighting fatigue from being in pain could be worse but I know there is. The past two years I have been dealing with rheumatoid arthritis. It sucks. It all started with a swollen knuckle and pain in my hands every single morning. Blood work was performed and everything came back normal except for the rheumatoid factor that tested positive so I went to a rheumatologist where I was told that I had it. I was then put on a prescription that required me to get my eyes checked often because a side effect of the medication could cause irreversible eye damage so that freaked me out. Usually I don't even take Advil or Tylenol for anything unless I am desperate to feel better and in this case I wanted to feel better. After a year of being on the prescription I stopped. The prescription took away the pain and I assumed slowed down the progression like it promised. However, I believe in a more holistic approach instead of masking the problem only to create another.
I smile through the pain and tough it out, but sometimes it eats away at me. I've studied anti-inflammatory diets. Vegetarianism worked best, but I I enjoy fish along with steak every so often to be completely disciplined. Yoga does help, but like any other physical work out, I find it can aggravate and cause flare ups as well if the practice is too rigorous. Keeping up with an active lifestyle helps with my sanity so it makes me sad when I have to listen to my body and rest so I don't pay for it the next day. Arthritis really blows and I feel like I am too young to have it. Unfortunately, these are the cards that were dealt to me so now I have to face it every day.
The cold weather may be a contributing factor which might be triggering it more than usual. I wake up every day with stiffness in my hands and it can feel defeating especially after eight hours of sleep when the body is supposed to heal. I believe I may have even slipped into a minor depression last month due to feeling so drained from dealing with it. Anyhow, I've tried everything under the sun including CBD oil, balms, etc You name it, I have tried it. I'm on my last resort, so it looks like I may need to go back on a prescription and deal with the possibility of messing up my eyes! Ugh! I know I can't take feeling like crap anymore unless there is some sort of winter magic that I have yet to find out about!
Anyways, Happy Lunar New Year!